Last Night was a really sad night. Crying on the phone to Tubbie, and crying to sleep. When he told me the truth that I dont really have any true friends (and i knew abt it all along just tt i dont want to face it), it really break my heart so badly. You dont know how it feels to know that friends find you when they need you, leave you when they dont need you, or even treat you as substitutes. I chose to not believe it but until I see it with my own eyes and realised how much i'm not worth in the eyes of these ppl. When Tubbie is in my life now, i've never neglected my friends but end up its the other way round. It seems like an 'automatic' reaction frm them when I've never wanted it to happen. And I'm not a clingy girlfriend. I've always enjoyed the company of friends around - but i've never had one.