Marche treat was ytd. Zen and I ate hell a lot. Rosti was our main purpose to eat there. and according to him, he says the food is rather salty. I didn even know tt. So i guess my sodium intake overshot ytd, without knowing it.

Zen shared with me otw home about bodybuilding and some underside of bodybuilding. I feel that he has gone really far in bodybuilding, having started out 4 years ago and he is really well experienced. Bodybuilding is really for him. A lifestyle that not many people have the talent for it, have the cut for it. Somehow i really admire how much he has been thru, how bodybuilding really shape his life to become who he is today. I must say, I'm really proud of him that he has achieved so much, just that i dont know how to tell him that you know, he is really someone any bodybuilder can look up too, I really respect him in this aspect a lot a lot. And i actually feel that, the one who is really really proud of him, but yet couldnt show it at all.. is none other than his late father. Though his father is no longer arnd, I believed He sees him thru his entire journey of bodybuilding. You know i didn mention his 'father' would be the one that is most proud of him.. because i dont want to remind him abt his father again, like why? So i said "family". But instead he was pretty -ve abt his family. Cos he claims his mother doesnt like him in this line and he is not even close to his sister. You know that blood is thicker than water rite? even i can say, i'm just 'water' to him, but yet he doesnt know that his mother deep down, is proud of her son. Somehow i looked into her eyes and facial expressions.. i know she really cares and i know she really loved him. You knw, some people just dont know how to express their love for a person at all, but deep down they really really love them so much.

Anyway, dont ever envy me that i'm fortunate to have him, that he is mine, my boyfriend etc. I dont know how long our r/s will last. Because i know i wont marry him for sure. hahahaha! Even though he claims he wants to marry me but i promise you tt's not gonna happen. Actually i'm just waiting for some new girl to come into his life and some new guy to come along or maybe even none, then we can come to a conclusion. I know you think its weird that i'm typing this but seriously, i know we have no future, honestly speaking. I'm too mature/sensitive for him and he needs someone younger and more of his type kind. We are not really compatible la. He has some flaws I really cannot accept. I dont trust him as much as what a gf shld have done. Why i dont trust him is because he doesnt convince me in ways that i shld place trust in him u know? You wouldnt believe it, i request for breakup hell lots of time alr. He doesnt let go cos he say he really loved me but i think its not true la. And you might ask, "Do i really love him?" Well, I do... sometimes only. On and Off. Its on the rocks. Maybe its true i fall in love easily and fall out of love easily. It's really true.

Anyway, I'm sorry, this blog entry is just to show tt he is like the limelight now. And i talk quite a lot abt him. But you know, this is like a phase of my life now. This phase will end soon. It's just a matter of time. Maybe the time when he's handcuffed to army and I'm handcuffed to school. Probably it'd be tt period everything now, will end.

Alrite, I've got school in a while. Exams in like 3 weeks time. So now i have to spend more time studying (but i dont seem to be doing that yet!). Hmmm gtg get ready. Update soon. (: